Sometimes I Feel Like A Ghost

May 12th is International ME/CFS/FM Awareness Day. For the second year I am participating in Blogging for ME/CFS Awareness.

For the last couple of months I've been dealing with the worst relapse I've had in several years. The brain fog has been horrendous....to the point where it didn't feel like I was even in my body. I spent many days wandering in my house...not knowing what I was doing or needed to do, unable to leave, drive, or care for myself. I felt vacant, hollow, numb.....the person who I know myself to be felt as if she were slipping away into a murky realm. I felt like a ghost....

I've improved quite a bit just in the last week....not enough to write a whole lot...With the help of my awesome husband, Tony, he took some photos of me....then I added those to some photos we took in early November 09. It felt good to create a piece of art again, which I haven't been able to do in some time.

This piece was inspired by my wandering our house, feeling like a ghost.



I've also started a new blog dedicated to my experiences with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome & Fibromyalgia. It's called Embers & Ash. That's where the majority of my blogging about CFS/FM will be. Please come by & take a peek sometime :)

What would you do?

2009 was a difficult year. After the twisted ankle in the Spring, I had a hysterectomy in the Fall. My CFS symptoms have been waxing & waning a lot & have kept me from doing a lot of things. I've missed blogging. I'm hoping to be able to get back to it more often in 2010. Just came across this video today & thought I'd share.

1/22/10: I was just looking at this again & I realized I didn't say what I would do if I were no longer sick. SO here's my list of things I would do: Join the roller derby team, rock climb, run Bloomsday, get a tattoo, join a gym, do one of those hook suspensions, clean my house, work in the studio 8 hours a day, be a real gardener with an amazing flower & veggie garden, take the burden off of my husband, visit friends more, leave the house on my own, skydive, turn the studio into a real live business which would mean also having the clarity to do all the business stuff & etsy stuff, sketch everyday, create everyday, travel, be a better wife & mom, read more. That's all I can think of right now.